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Compassionate Mind, Healthy Body

Wed, 27 Mar 2019 16:14:36 GMT

Overwhelming evidence suggests compassion is good for our health and good for the world.

This is the best article I heave read about compassion. Happy reading! - Amber

Decades of clinical research has explored the psychology of human suffering. Yet that suffering, as unpleasant as it is, often has a bright side: compassion. Human suffering often inspires beautiful acts of compassion by people wishing to help relieve that suffering. What led 26.5 percent of Americans to volunteer in 2012 (according to statistics from the US Department of Labor)? What propels someone to serve food at a homeless shelter, pull over on the highway in the rain to help someone with a broken down vehicle, or feed a stray cat?

Traditionally, research has paid less attention to these questions than to the roots of pain, evil, and pathology. But over the past decade, this has started to change dramatically. Nearly 10 years ago, in his Greater Good article “The Compassionate Instinct,” Greater Good Science Center co-founder Dacher Keltner summarized the emerging findings from this new science of human goodness, proposing that compassion is “an evolved part of human nature, rooted in our brain and biology.” Research since then—from neuroscience, evolutionary psychology, behavioral health, developmental science, and other disciplines—has backed him up convincingly. Again and again, studies have suggested that compassion is indeed an evolved part of human nature, vital to good health and even to the survival of our species. What was a relative handful of intriguing studies has become a scientific movement that is transforming our views of humanity.

What is compassion?

What is compassion and how is it different from empathy or altruism? The definition of compassion is often confused with that of empathy. Empathy, as defined by researchers, is the visceral or emotional experience of another person’s feelings. It is, in a sense, an automatic mirroring of another’s emotion, like tearing up at a friend’s sadness. Altruism is an action that benefits someone else. It may or may not be accompanied by empathy or compassion, for example in the case of making a donation for tax purposes. Although these terms are related to compassion, they are not identical. Compassion often does, of course, involve an empathetic response and an altruistic behavior. However, compassion is defined as the emotional response when perceiving suffering and involves an authentic desire to help alleviate that suffering.

continue reading here... https://greatergood.berkeley.edu/article/item/compassionate_mind_healthy_body

It all began with a simple question

Tue, 05 Mar 2019 14:33:00 GMT

What do we learn from yoga?

I share yoga with children. It is one of the great joys of my life.

If you were to peek into my children’s yoga classes the first thing you would notice is that they look nothing like adult classes. There is a lot of noise, activity and laughter, the occasional tear or tantrum and, of course, lots of hugs. You might see us building igloos out of yoga blocks, hula hooping, playing Freeze Yoga, navigating a yoga obstacle course, reading a story or dreaming up our own crazy poses. There’s a good chance there would be colorful feathers, scarves and pom-poms skittering across the floor and the occasional Barbie doll or stuffed animal joining us on our mats. You might even see us creating yoga poses with Legos, bendy colored wire or cookies. And, if you were lucky enough to be there on just the right day, you could join us for glow in the dark pajama yoga, a pirate adventure, a journey into outer space or even help us write and star in the wildly popular Crazy Yoga Movie.

As you watched the pandemonium, you would wonder what all that craziness had to do with yoga, and probably have serious doubts that the kids were learning anything at all.

You might concede that they are learning poses and stretching, but I suspect you would doubt that they were getting anything more. What about the finer points of yoga, the “important stuff”? After all, you might reason, yoga is a serious and thoughtful practice. How could they possibly be learning anything about centering and focus with all that chaos? What about alignment? What about finding peace? What about connecting the breath with the mind and the body? What about quiet introspection? Surely Patanjali and B.K.S. Iyengar are rolling over in their graves at this spectacle!

To be quite honest I sometimes worried about that myself. I know the research says that children learn best by doing, using all of their senses to explore and experiment, and I know how important imagination and creative thinking are to their development. Still, I worried that all that fun and lack of “structure” meant that there wasn’t a whole lot of learning going on.

I recently discovered I was, quite happily, wrong.

It all began with a simple question.

I was introducing Mandalas and I wanted to talk about how they can help calm the mind and body. I was curious to see if the kids had a grasp of some of the less tangible aspects of yoga, so I asked my class of five to ten year olds, “What do we learn from yoga?” I fully expected them to talk about the physical poses since that would be the most concrete and obvious to them, and they certainly did that; but, what surprised and humbled me was just exactly how much they knew and understood about the “important stuff”. Here is the list they came up with:

What We Learn from Yoga

Kindness

Relaxation

Working together

Love

Peacefulness

Fun

Taking care of ourselves

Taking care of each other

Poses

Quiet

Happiness

Being kind to the earth

Stretches

To communicate

Flexibility

Breathing

Calming down

Creativity

Patience

To keep trying

Helpfulness

To see the best in people

I never explicitly told them any of those things. They figured them out and internalized them by doing yoga, having fun and jumping into every single experience with joy and abandon. They had no preconceived notions about what they were going to “get out of it”. They weren’t worried about what they were supposed to do or if they were doing it right . They just did it, and in the process, they learned about themselves, other people and world around them.

So, take it from the kids, stretch your mind and your body. Breathe. Communicate. Cooperate with others. Listen, laugh, share and love. Take time out to relax. And, most of all, live your yoga.

Love, Forgiveness & Gratitude

Mon, 18 Feb 2019 13:02:49 GMT

A Year-Long Valentine: Love, Forgiveness, and Gratitude

Valentine's Day may be over, but we all know showing our love for others cannot happen only one day a year. Showing our love daily doesn't come from gits, flowers, and chocolates (although you should throw those in on occasion to back up everything else and to keep things exciting). Showing our love comes from daily acts of love, forgiveness, and appreciation (gratitude). Below is an article I stumble across that sums this up in a very succinct way.

Originally Posted Jan 30, 2019 on Psychology Today

Instead of focusing on one day, think about long term goals and expectations. Expectations can run high on Valentine's Day. While many wish for hearts and flowers, whether one is in a relationship or single, February 14 can be stressful. By thinking in terms of give and take to balance expectations—in all relationships—a sense of calm is within reach. Here are some thoughts for a year-round Valentine. According to VanderDrift and Agnew, Journal of Personality and Social Psychology:

“Individuals balance tasks necessary to fulfill personal goals and to maintain their interpersonal relationships.”

However, to do so might require a change in thinking. In our heart of hearts, we all know what we should be doing to bring harmony into our own lives and the lives of those around us. Ancient philosophers have long told us:

Speak kindly to everyone you meet. We all carry a heavy burden.
Wish blessings to others, even those who hurt you.
Be forgiving of everyone who has ever hurt you, and most especially forgive yourself instead of saying "Why didn't I?"
Express your love to those whom you really love, instead of saying, "They know I love them."
Form the words, " I love you."
Remind yourself often throughout the day that those you love are a gift and you have no idea just how long they will be yours to cherish.
Let go of anger and resentment.
Be kind. As Massachusetts poet, philosopher, and lecturer Ralph Waldo Emerson has said: “You cannot do a kindness too soon, because you never know how soon it will be too late.”

Each year as Valentine’s Day approaches I think of the words of Leo Buscaglia, author of Love , who said that if we are waiting for the one and only, "I guarantee you’ll wait forever! There is no right person. You become the right person!” In the hustle and bustle of our overly committed lives, do we ever remember to take time to listen for love instead of waiting for the “one and only” love?

8 Ways to Approach Valentine's Day

Sometimes we need to clear our heads and hearts so that we can hear love. Perhaps this Valentine’s Day, begin clearing the path for love. Here are ways to approach Valentine’s Day.

Let go of worn-out friendships and relationships.
Break old patterns that hinder your happiness.
Take a chance on an out-of-character relationship.
Be more forgiving of others without losing your sense of self or your values.
Laugh at yourself and be accepting of yourself.
Forgive your past love mistakes.
Move forward with a renewed sense of self and spirit.
Express gratitude to those around you.

“I am grateful for the days you lift my spirits when I’m sad.”
“I thank you for calling me when you are traveling.”
“I love when you send me an unexpected xoxo text.”
“I appreciate that you listen to me when I speak.”

Adapt an Attitude of Gratitude:

Robert A. Emmons, Ph.D., professor of psychology at the University of California at Davis, reminds us often in his writings, as in interviews with him:

"Gratitude is an attitude, not a feeling that can be easily willed." Even if you are not satisfied with your life as it is today, he pointed out, "if you go through grateful motions, the emotion of gratitude should be triggered. It is like improving your posture and as a result becoming more energetic and self-confident." Dr. Emmons added: "Attitude change often follows behavior change. By living the gratitude that we do not necessarily feel, we can begin to feel the gratitude that we live."

Love Thought:

If you have been hurt by love, be grateful for the experience and take a chance on embracing its mystery once again. Express love and gratitude on Valentine’s Day to family, friends, co-workers, children and to those who are lonely and need a smile from your heart. Smile at strangers who look sad. Just smiling alone makes us feel happier. The Duchene Smile . Then remind yourself that sharing joy, love, and understanding should be year 'round goals.

References

VanderDrift, L. E., & Agnew, C. R. (2014). Relational consequences of personal goal pursuits. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 106(6), 927-940.

RA Emmons - "Thanks!: How the new science of gratitude can make you happier" 2007, Houghton Mifflin.

My First Blog Post

Wed, 06 Feb 2019 19:15:24 GMT

It's official, we have a blog!

I have finally decided to take the plunge and add a blog to the Yana web page. I have always wanted an easy way to share information with visitors and am super excited to start this journey. Keep coming back to check for new posts! Our first post is about... How to accomplish goals and raise your self-esteem…

Taken in part from "A Woman's Self-Esteem" by Nathaniel Braden

One of the most potent ways of raising self-esteem, and thereby getting more satisfaction in life and being happier, is by converting wishes and desires into purposes. The trouble is, most people don't know how. If people understand the idea of operating purposefully at all, they are most likely to understand it in the workplace. They are least likely to understand its application in their personal life. Here is what I mean...

One of my clients, I’ll call her Caroline, felt herself torn between her love life, her many women friends, and her career as owner of a highly successful flower business. “I would like to be a better partner to Max. I really care for him, but he complains I don’t give us enough time. I’m always in a rush or on the telephone." "What would you like to be different?" I inquired. She seemed puzzled by the question. “I’d like both of us to be happier in our relationship." " What do you see yourself doing that would make both of you happier?" "I'd help create a better relationship?" She said, a little tentatively. "Good, if that’s your purpose, what actions would you need to take to create a better relationship?" Clearly this line of questioning had not occurred to her. “I’m embarrassed to admit that I don’t know. I know that my purpose at work is to increase sales 20% this year, for which you better believe I have an action plan! But, I guess I don’t really have a purpose for this relationship, just a wish.” Caroline embarked on, what she called “an interesting experiment,” to learn what would happen if she brought as much focus and purpose to improving her relationship with Max as she brought to her business activities. This meant, among other things, taking charge of her time so that her relationship with Max did not suffer from malnutrition. Today she is successful in both areas of her life.

Here is how to make your desires a purpose:

Ask yourself what actions you would need to take to achieve your purpose/goal, in reality, rather than just dream about it.
Design an action plan and begin to implement it, step-by-step.
Monitor your progress and pay attention to the outcome of your actions.
Adjust your plans and behavior as necessary to keep yourself on track.

Doing this, moving your desires and dreams into an purpose with an action plan to make it happen will give a great sense of personal power and increase your self-worth and self-esteem. If you find yourself sabotaging your dreams/purpose, figure out why, then try again.

Leave your questions and comments below! Thanks for reading our first blog post!